Of Homophobes And Allies

Just the other day I was reading Bridgeout’s blog and there was this post in which she mentioned an encounter with a homophobic friend:

“And what happened next let me know I could not tell that friend I was gay. I looked in the rear-view mirror at my friend and she looked like she was going to VOMIT! This person she thought was so cool and so enjoyed talking with was suddenly “sickening” her because of sexual orientation.”

I so totally understand that. I had a similar encounter not too long ago. I was eating with M and E when the topic suddenly turned to homosexuals. M said he’s alright with them since “what they don’t harm anyone right?”. He went on to say that he has many gay friends. He doesn’t understand them, but he can accept them.

E, on the other hand, was a little apprehensive. He mumbled that homosexuals are alright but “don’t you find them a…um…a little sick?” And accompanying that little statement was a facial expression that said a big firm “UGH.”

Naturally, I never told him about my sexual orientation. It would be quite sad to lose a good friend. He’s a wonderful friend in all aspects, except this one.

Anyway, I came out to another person this week! Remember H from my previous post? Yes! Him! Hahahaha. I had a major argument with my parents over my “homosexual problem”. I called H and told him that I was upset and needed someone to come eat with me. Which, surprisingly, he did. And everything spilled out from there. It was rather nice:) He received it quite well. And we’re still on talking terms so I guess it was a good move.

Well at least not everyone’s a homophobe:)

Everything I’m Not Looking For

There’s a new guy at work. Let’s call him H. He’s geeky – the kind who spills out knowledgeable things and knows how to fix up my computer. He’s not fit, is slightly pudgy, and is severely meticulous, bordering paranoia. And I’ve got a crush on him.

I don’t know why. He’s not even 50% of the things I look for in a guy – see previous posts. I’m quite appalled at myself. But whenever I see him, I feel childishly thrilled. It’s so embarrassing. Something about him attracts me – and it’s definitely NOT his physique or hotness. It’s not even his hair. Maybe it’s his razor sharp wit. Or maybe it’s the way he speaks so intelligently. Or maybe, it’s the way he looks when he’s hard at work (which by the way, is kinda cute). OMG. What am I doing?

Coming Out

Ok, so I went over to http://www.getyourqueeron.com/ to do this Coming Out interview, as mentioned in the previous post. And here it is!

On a totally different note, I started to develop this nasty cough a few days ago. Blame it all on the mooncakes (sidenote: mooncakes are little delicacies eaten here in this part of the world during the Mid Autumn Festival. They’re usually round like the moon (hence the name) and made of lotus paste, covered in a baked or glutinous rice crust).

This year, we had mooncakes from Raffles Hotel. OMG. They had mocha fillings with a solid chocolate ball in the middle! I had 6 of those in the last week itself. Hahaha. Sugar overload!

More of Life’s Screwballs

I’ve been thinking why it’s quite difficult for me to come out. Maybe it’s because I am still financially dependent on my family. Maybe it’s because most of my social circle is made up of church friends.  Maybe it’s because 99% of gay people I know were one night stands, only looking for a good time and definitely not looking for a support network.

Of course, not to come out would mean hiding for an indefinite period of time. Which, as much as I hate it, seems to be the only feasible option now. But then again, I have (hopefully) a long future in front of me. I can wait and see.

Speaking about future, I was very much seduced, recently, by the idea of becoming a geologist. Imagine travelling the world, studying climate change, rock formations etc. Wow. But that clashes with my current plans – I have secured a place in a local university to study Psychology. Now one can’t possibly study rocks with a Psychology degree can he?

SO, I went around doing my research and what did I find? That the local university actually started a new Earth Observatory this year to study natural hazards, including climate change! YAY! But they are not sure when they will be offering an undergraduate course in Earth Sciences. Knowing these things, they will probably take eons to start something like that, by when I could be happily retired. Hmm. Life throws us such screwballs ever so often doesn’t it?

Oh yea, do check out http://www.getyourqueeron.com/interviews.php

You can post as well as read fellow LGBT coming out stories there. Very interesting, very insightful:) (courtesy of gayinpublic – If you’re reading this, I love the pic of you and that levitating block. HAHA. Hilarious!)

Fame

I hate it when someone calls me “sweetie”, “darling”, “baby”, “honey” etc. It makes me go ugh, with an accompanying chill down my back. I know people use that as a term of endearment, to express how much they love their partner – and that’s a very very sweet thing to do – but i just don’t feel that way. Maybe I’m just weird?

Anyway, I caught Fame yesterday and can anyone say A-M-A-Z-I-N-G? Yea! It was a wonderful movie – a little on the short/rushed side, but wonderful non-theless. It is so vibrant, full of energy and inspiring to boot! And the songs, dance moves were awesome. Makes me want to go take dance lessons…Hahahha. There is a line in the theme song, Fame, that goes like this:

Remember my name!

I’m gonnna live forever,

I’m gonna learn how to fly!

Isn’t it amazing, how youth is like a drug that makes you feel seemingly invincible and immortal. There’s something about being young that is so exuberant and full of hope that you really feel like you can live forever; when life feels like a never ending myriad of possibilities. Yea. I love being young:)

Watch the Fame music video here:

Today My Colleage Told Me She Hates Gays

And I didn’t know what to say. Her exact words were “Those freaks are ridiculous! So INSANE to go against the order of nature!”

I didn’t know what to say. I’ve never come face to face with anything so vitriolic before.  And I am ashamed to say that I just kept mum in response.

10 Things I Like In A Man

Hmmm. What I like in a man:

1. Tall. Or at least taller than I am, which shouldn’t be a problem. Hahaha

2. Facial hair. Of course, nothing too long/thick. Just enough to prickle. Whoa, sexy:)

3. Broad chest, shoulders etc, the works.

4. Sexy ass.

5. A little bit of chest hair won’t hurt anyone.

6. Smart. And witty.

7. And what’s a man without humour? I think this is one of the most important points. I like to laugh.

8. Sentimental. I like romance:)

9. Kind to the less fortunate. I think it’s important to never forget those who don’t have as much as I do, even if it’s something as simple as food or clothes.

10. Loves life. No point being gloomy over the sad bits and missing the wonderful things.

Bonus points if he looks like this:

Gerard Butler

Of Pinkies & Squeals

“Don’t raise your pinkie when you’re drinking!”

“Could you please behave a little more manly?”

I always get these from my mum and dad. And I wonder – I mean, why is it that the stereotypical gay man is so effeminate while his lesbian counterpart is such a butch? Is it because society has a general rule dictating how men and women should conduct themselves, and we homosexuals unconsciously adopt the rules meant for the opposite sex? Or can it be that there is indeed a gene in our DNA strand that makes gay men behave like straight women and lesbians like straight men?

As fantastic as it sounds, we cannot discount the gay gene reasoning. I mean, research has found that the brains of gay men and straight women are very similar. So perhaps we are more inclined to the same things i.e dolls, squeals and men?

So is it justified?

Why Is It That The Nice/Cute Ones Are Always Straight?

The title says it all. Met a nice/cute guy last week. Let’s call him A. Today we had a conversation on the bus. I like him. He’s a little shy, but knowledgeable, funny, everything a gay guy can want. But I think he’s straight. In fact he most probably is. So, I realised that most guys I fall for (or more likely get infatuated with) are straight. Why oh why oh why?

My Favourite Bollywood Actors:)

Just a few. They make me giddy with excitement:)

Saif Ali Khan

Akshay Kumar

John Abraham

Shahid Kapoor

Dino Morea